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Amusive Communications acquires Excite.com and Angelfire.com
July 14th, 1999

Amusive Communications, in a move that shocked the internet, acquired leading websites Excite.com and Angelfire.com. Stunned staff trying to figure, exactly, what is going on.

SHOREWOOD, IL, July 14th - Amusive Communications announced today that it had full and complete control over two incredibly high trafficed websites, Excite and Angelfire. Ownership accidentally traded hands in a confusing clash of confoundment that left the whole world wondering, exactly, what the hell was going on.

When asked for comment, CEO Jim Reardon could only respond "wow."

Further pressed, he answered "I mean - wow."

Reardon immediately contacted the people at Excite and Network Solutions, the body that governs control over domain names, in order to get the matter straightened out. Meanwhile, he also noticed many other registration attempts that, luckily, did not make it through.

Reardon did not notice he had Angelfire.com until someone from Lycos, their parent company, called him and informed him.

While talking to an interviewer with Salon.com, an overwhelmed Reardon said something very, very stupid. When asked why he didn't use the domains for evil or wrong purposes (such as directing traffic to, say, "Bob's XXX-O-Rama"), Reardon stated "my mamma trained me right." Having said his one incredibly idiodic comment for the interview, he then made well-versed responses to the questions. Only the idiodic comment made it into the story, however.

Angelfire, whose transfer was discovered later than Excite's, unfortunately experienced a few hours of downtime in the matter. They are currently investgating in to who submitted the fraudulent transfer requests.

Amusive Communications is a leading content portal, providing links to other Amusive properties, such as Free Center and Humor Planet.